20 Sep VIDUE (confession) and Tshuvah
In preparation for the New Year, during the month of Elul we do a thorough introspection of ourselves so we my do thorough tshuvah (the process of atonement to return to pristine state of being).
For some this may mean using some form of note taking of our negatively impacting actions (in the past year or more) such as journaling. The practice is called in Hebrew a ‘cheshbon hanefesh’ or personal inventory. This practice helps us to ‘break-down’ our transgressions so they become more manageable. It is so positively impacting that it is used in modern therapy and by millions in the 12 Step of Recovery of Alcoholics Anonymous and its many affiliated organizations.
There is a meditative prayer known as Vidue (Confession) which is said daily by many. An extended version of Vidue is said on the High Holidays. It addresses 22 categories of transgressions which is kabbalistically a significant number as there are 22 letters in the Hebrew alphabet with each letter possessing a ‘power’ (influence). As the Torah is written with these 22 letters it is said that the 22 represents all the letters and all the potential power of the Torah. And so it points to the power of the 22 categories of transgression and our tshuvah.
What is of particular interest is the final verse 22; ‘We have been abominable...we have strayed, you have let us go astray’. Some may read this as a though we are blaming G-d for allowing us to transgress however it is a powerful statement that reveals how G-d Loves us and allows us to have Free Will to choose the elevating path of Righteousness or the negatively impacting path of Transgression. In either case, with the power of our Tshuvah , G-d is there to help elevate us.
When doing a cheshbon hanefesh ‘as a searching inventory’, we may find the ‘bullet points’ of the Vidue prayer-meditation a useful guideline to help raise our awareness of possible transgressions that a person is obligated to rectify. This should be done with a deep focus, sincerity and humility.
Leib Getzel (Lawrence) Lax
Addictions and Counseling
http://lawrencelax.com
lawrenceJlax@gmail.com